Preen, Eagle, Preen!

(Apologies to Mur Lafferty (http://murverse.com/) for the title)

One of the current hot Internet obsessions is a webcam showing a bald eagle family. Tune into http://www.ustream.tv/decoraheagles , and you too will see a bald eagle family. Mostly, though, you will be seeing the mother, with a few appearances by the father as he literally brings home the bacon, or the bald eagle equivalent thereof. If you happen to be a member of PETA, I’d recommend not watching because you’ll be horrified to see a mother eagle cheerfully ripping apart a rabbit or salmon and feeding chunks of it to her babies. Bald eagles are not known for their vegetarian diets.

I was introduced to this by a coworker, because the bald eagles are located in none other than Decorah. I’m not entirely sure where in Decorah, although it wouldn’t be hard to find out. However, it’s more fun watching the eagles through a webcam. First, let’s be honest, the weather is still simply too cold for all but the most die-hard bird watchers to really want to be outdoors watching for an hour. Second, if you were to watch these eagles in real life, you’d only be getting a view from the ground, which would rob you of some of the more interesting moments. You could get closer, but then you’d risk becoming a participant. Then again, if you were to watch in real life you wouldn’t have the occasional commercial for genuine American Eagle Coins at the bottom of the screen, or whatever else Google thinks is relevant to show you. (Another one—Econo Lodge Eagle Nest. I can understand being so moved by watching these bald eagles that I’d immediately invest in a set of collector coins that almost have something to do with the occasion, but I don’t think I’d ever feel so moved by watching these bald eagles that I’d immediately want to stay in a motel.)

So what do these bald eagles do? Mostly they take care of their babies. Sometimes they preen, other times they maintain their nest. I missed the hatching, which took place over three days. I missed the last one, even though I knew it was happening soon, because I had to get a workout in. There’s something symbolic about missing the hatching of a bald eagle on a webcam while you’re busy working out, but I’m not sure what it is.

Let’s get back to the nest, though. It is, like the eagles themselves, deceptively small-looking.  I’m always amazed when I see how big the eagles are up close. The smallest bald eagle is at least two feet long from head to tail, while the larger ones are over three feet long. Hold out your arm. Unless you’re a professional basketball player, a bald eagle is about that long. That’s frigging huge, by the way. Their wingspan is between 66 and 96 inches. Sixty inches is five feet, by the way. Ninety-six inches is eight feet. So their wingspan is as big, if not bigger, than a human being.  For a bird that big, you can imagine they have even bigger nests. The Decorah bald eagle nest has been used to hatch eggs for the past three years now, and it is estimated to weigh about a ton. That is a lot of straw and branches. Another quick Wikipedia look says that the average nest can get to be 13 feet deep and 8.2 feet wide.  I still can’t wrap my mind around the concept of bald eagles having a nest that big. It doesn’t help that the nest and the eagles themselves don’t look that big, at least not without something for comparison.

Another thing that strikes me each time I look at these bald eagles is how majestic and dignified the mom and dad look. The babies, not so much, but then again babies tend more toward being cute than dignified. The adults, though, there’s something about their face that says, “No matter what happens in this life, I will not only face it head on, but I will succeed.”  No wonder we made this bird the symbol of the United States. I remember that Ben Franklin wanted the turkey to be the symbol of the United States at one time. He also thought the rattlesnake would be good too, but let’s ignore that for now. Franklin liked the fact that the turkey was more seemingly courageous than the bald eagle, who he considered cowardly. The problem is that the turkey doesn’t have any of the dignity the bald eagle possesses. I think ol’ Ben might have had more insight than he let on, though, when he suggested the turkey as our national symbol. The turkey looks kind of unkempt, and while he can look good if he just takes the time to put his plumage up, usually he goes around with his unkempt beard, looking for all the world like he just woke up from a monster rave the night before. He also struts when he walks, as if to say, “Yeah, you want some of this, don’t you?” The turkey is a middle-class and low-class bird, one that doesn’t really do dignity. In other words, it represents most Americans perfectly. The bald eagle is the image of America that we want to present to the rest of the world and, indeed, what we would like to be. The turkey is what we actually are. If I had been one of the founding fathers, I’d have gone with the bald eagle too.